"A majority of people these days are really good actors. They act for the sake of pleasing ones heart and ears. But none truly cares how you feel. Words are a powerful tool and it is with this tool that they use to cover one's eyes. None of them are for real. Liars!" - Eug (angered) -

Konichiwa mina san. I'm really feeling angry and vexxed right now. It's strange how one's mood can change by the power of words. Well, I'll start from the beggining first.

Today I had a test for my English Communication Skills. It wasn't that hard, although I have to say that the marking system should be revised and the usage of words more wide. English is a rich language and there are so many words that can be used to make a sentence sound from casual to something out of a fairy tale. Well, unfortunately me lecturer decided to use his English of 'narrow' proportions, resulting in a lot of arguable questions.

Anyways, I guess there's nothing much to say since after all he's the one who's marking the paper. And he's also quite an okay lecturer so I didn't want to start a war or something. After class went straight to lunch, followed by Pump It Up!

A friend mentioned something about the 'main' group. It's strange how it feels to be away from the 'main' group. I feel that there's more freedom to do things compared to when I was in the 'main' group. In the 'main' group I felt like I was in a cage where everyone didn't care. They just locked you up and throw away the keys. I was a minority of a voice, a voice so tiny it can be ignored. When I was away from the 'main' group I somehow felt accepted. I could do things that I wanted to do. And I could actually say things where people would turn their heads and listen instead of turn their backs and ignore you. Being left out isn't the easiest things to cope with, not after the incident months back. The emptiness is still within me and even though I don't show it I feel it. That's why my Design lecturer Denise is such a remarkable person. She sees this unlike many other people. I guess it's because we're both alike in some crucial ways.

Anyways, after lunch went for a session of Pump It Up! It was great. Played two games and the best part was that I didn't have to wait long cos there weren't many people. You wouldn't believe how frustrating it is to wait, especially for Pump! I still have to upgrade my standard for "We Are" by Deux. Song rocks but moves are hard.

After that, sent my friends home and then went to my own home. Popped in front of the computer. Now, this is where the anger starts flowing in. Started reading stuff on the Net and I felt the fire start to burn. Yet again the past hit me. I was so furious and I still am right now as I sit here writing this blog. Only a few people know what I'm talking about.

Okay, let me give you a clue. Say you have a friend who decided to do a project with you. That friend tells you all these great things that the both of you are going to do together in such a way that he or she really means it. The next thing you know, that friend forgets about you and does the thing by him or herself without you knowing it. That friend totally forgets what he said to you and does things that only he or she wants to do. Sound familiar? Ring any bells? And worse of all, that friend can tell you things straight in the face, make promises with you in front of other witnesses and yet break them again! As if that friend cared how you felt. Only that friend cared about his or herself. LIAR!

This is where I state that words are powerful tools. Saying promises that are later broken. There's no justice! Hey friend who breaks your word and promises! You ain't done nothing but talk only! Screw you bloody -Censored-! I don't care what people think. I'm already sick and tired of people treating me like dirt and pushing me around and making fun of me and using me. I don't need another LIAR!

Breath in. Breath out. Breath in. Breath out. There's no justice that I can seek. It's already too late. The damage has been done. I'm left to bleed, my willpower withered and soul tattered. There're many more things that I would like to say but if I do, I'd hurt people's feelings. Ka-pish? Pathetic liar.

I've been feeling empty these days. A 'place' where I could go to was no longer there. Tainted by lies and deceit. I thought I could open up whenever I'm in this 'place'. No more. I felt the very same things as what the 'main' group left behind. I felt left out.

"Blood drips from an open wound in my chest. I looked up and winced as my torn wings hurt. I've lost this battle, betrayed by the people I trust the most. But I shall go on. I must go on. Never again, to believe in words of people that just talk...but don't do. I will not, must not fall into the traps of a liar." - Adenol (walking towards the ray of light called Truth And Realisation) -